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Apr. 26th, 2010 @ 11:54 pm Knitting and stuff
Current Mood: accomplishedaccomplished
After my semi huge yarn haul, im now diving face first into knitting again...and I must say..i've missed it=-) For those that do follow me on here, i'd actually like to close this blog and have my friends follow me either via facebook (www.facebook.com/ipimpblue) or by reading my knitting blog if your interested in that...granted I rarely update it unless im knitting something but the link to that is: http://ipimpblue.blogspot.com/ But anyway. Thats that!
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Mar. 18th, 2010 @ 09:43 am life and stuff
Current Mood: happyhappy
Life is going pretty good...some things have happened that are not so good, but for the most part...life is getting better all the time. I completed my CNA in December of 09, but so far no job, although I have (finally) gotten some call backs, and have had some decent interviews, one wants to hire me but can't because im not on the MN Nurses Aid Registry, but I have some interviews tomorrow for Wisconsin based jobs, so that wont be a problem...I've always had a theory that if I could secure an interview, I will get the job...so far thats held true, and I hope beyond hope that it holds true tomorrow...we really, really need the money.
On better news, someone made an offer on our house a few months back, we're just waiting for the paperwork to go threw and all that jazz. We're not to sure where we'll move, but we're thinking baldwin or sommerset...possibly hudson depending on prices of apartments. I'd love to go to Hudson, but realistically right now...Baldwin or Sommerset is probably better.
I dont really use livejournal much anymore, so for any of my friends reading, if you want to keep up with all the happenings in my life (not exactly exciting stuff to be honest) then feel free to add me on facebook...www.facebook.com/ipimpblue I update a lot on there, and find it easier to keep in touch with people.
Pat and I are doing ok I guess, we're both pretty stressed about the house selling and money issues, he is still on unemployment but we hope with spring/summer on the way the business will reopen and all will be well...if hes working full time and im working at least part/full time, we'll be fine. Still poor, but fine=-) lol. Anyway, thats all I got. Still knitting of course, although i've kind of stagnated on it, been to busy. Was really busy with school for a while, and studying for the state test, but after that, I just got bored with it, although I still pick up my needles...and when I do I can't put them down.
Time to get off of here and get dressed...almost 10am and still in my pjs...never thought i'd be one for sleeping at night and being awake during the day...who'd have thought=-)
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Nov. 3rd, 2009 @ 12:12 pm Halloween!
Current Location: Lost in happy land
Current Mood: cheerfulcheerful
Current Music: In Flames -Pallar Anders Visa
We had no trick or treaters, which I was sad about, but we still carved pumpkins and they turned out nifty!

mine are on the left! Happy drunk pumpkin! yay!

these are obviously NOT pumpkins! but they are my new interchangeable needles from knitpicks.com and I cannot wait for them to get here! pat got me these as a 'just because' present and omg...I LOVE THEM...and I love him, more importantly=-)
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Nov. 3rd, 2009 @ 12:03 pm kaknittering!
Current Mood: cheerfulcheerful
Current Music: in flames- alias
yay knitting! Here are some pictures! No cut for you, sorry for taking up room on your page!

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Oct. 27th, 2009 @ 08:57 am Update!
Seems its been a while since i've posted and update, so here we go!
Pat and I are doing great! We put the house up for shortsale tomorrow and while we were kind of sad at first, we are both happy to finally be moving on. Been working on knitting stuff, always fun! Still can't knit a friggin hat, but i'll get there sooner or later. Fall is finally here, and all the beautiful colors, the cold wind...i love it! I never really liked the cold in VA...but in Wisconsin, I dunno, its just...nifty. Oh, I wanted to say im also on facebook and myspace...I use facebook a lot, but use myspace to actually blog...facebook is facebook.com/ipimpblue and myspace is myspace.com/illusions_of_reality feel free to add both=)
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Sep. 11th, 2009 @ 05:57 pm Knitting.
Current Mood: accomplishedaccomplished
Current Music: Blue Foundation- life of a ghost
Is not as easy as I thought it would be. I met a girl thru witch-vox.com and we had a knit night...and watched this nifty show - warehouse 13. I liked it so much, im going to download season 1:D But yes...the knitting will come along, just going to take some time. she pointed out some good websites to help, knittinghelp.com, and ravelry.com (the facebook of knitting) so im excited to guy buy some new needles and get to it:D On further news...we have a new kitten. Pat attracts kittens like shit does flys. I don tmind though, shes a good little kitty. Im off to finish dinner, as pat should be home anytime now.

Caroline...Im sorry I missed you while you were state side. Hope to see you 2010! 
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Jan. 31st, 2009 @ 04:44 am 25 more things you could probably care less about
Current Mood: amusedamused
Current Music: Nightwish White night fantasy
You guys know the drill.

25 facts about me. If I tag you, you really don't need to do this. I can't promise that will NOT die by having a UFO land on you while you're having bad sex if you don't do this, but I'm pretty sure you won't. I just thought you might find this interesting. Also, if you've already done it, sorry. I can't keep track of who has and who hasn't.


1) I love music. Always have. I love to write it, sing it, make it..study it

2) I put on a great show of caring..when honestly..I dont care. I make a horrible friend at times.

3) I cannot have children. I am ok with this.

4) I lived in VA for 20ish years. I moved to WI a few months after I turned 21...I met my roommmate CJ on a mmorpg known as Dungeons and Dragons online.

5) I use to think my mom was my best friend...now im scared im going to end up hating her.

6) Lately i've noticed I have a deep seeded need for spirituality in my life. I do not respect christianity and all the bullshit that goes with it. I've dabbled in hindism, buddhism, the nitty gritty bits of paganism and various forms of herbal 'witch craft'.

7) I've decided that the medical field is where I want to go with my career...motivating myself to get off my ass and do it is a whole other issue. Sometimes im afraid im not ambitious enough for my own goals..thus having been proved a few times over and im scared i'll end up a nobody working at mcdonalds. wait...thats motivation enough right there.

8) I want to learn Russian, or Italian. But to be honest, my understandin of the english language and all the parts that make it what it is is scratchy at best. But I think, tomorrow afternoon, instead of thinking about it im going to finally do it.

9) I own two cats that I want to kill every single day. Im not a cat person.

10) I tried to do volunteer work working with disadvantaged children. It made me appreciate and respect the single mothers and fathers I met every single day...it also made me feel a hatred for my own mother and how she raised me.

11) In my lifetime, espeiclly around my 19-21..I did a LOT of drugs. I did ectasy for about four months straight, then went to cocain and snorting heroin. I did that for about a year. I do not care what yout hink of me for this, despite what you may think, not everyone is perfect, and not everyone really cares about the health and psychological side effects drug use has on them.

12) In the past two years, i've realized I do not love my boyfriend. He worships me, and the more he showers me with love, gifts, snuggles and rather amazing sex...the more distant I feel from him and I do not know what to do about it...im afraid when I leave him, it'll destory all confidence he has in himself..which is the main reason i've yet to leave.

13) I have a unhealthy love of starbucks. Im ok with this.

14)I fell in love with a man when I was 18...I destroyed him...I cheated on him with a guy named Adam, I eventually left my then fiance for Adam and dated him for over a year...in that year, we did probably 12 to 15 bottles worth of 2 month supply of pain killers...we could go thru 1 bottle in about a week. I destoryed him as well...and till this day I have a hard time feeling remorse or hurt by doing what I did to those 2..even though I tell other people different..

15) I love helping people (ironic huh?). It makes me feel a sense of happiness when I can sit down, talk to someone, and help them. A good friend of mine was suicidal when we were both doing things we shouldnt have been...after talking to him for three hours and finally both of us falling asleep on his bed, I knew that I had a gift for helping people, and started doing volunteer work at battered womens shelter, suicide help lines, and doing volunteer work with big brothers big sisters. I loved getting calls or letters fromthe people I helped letting me know I saved them in one way or another...yet in my personal life, I continued to hurt the ones I claimed to love simply because I could.

16) I use to be the center of the party...I had no problem talking with people, laughing, and having a good time...lately, I would rather stay home and play video games and forget the world is a real place with real people in it.

17) I've tried, and i've tried to write a novel. I use to write all the time. I even won a poetry contest coming in second place with a poem I wrote called 'feelings'. I no longer write anymore, unless im hurting, or very, very depressed.

18) I'll be 24 in 9 months, yet I feel i've lived about 5 lifetimes to long...is it doom and gloom of me to say that im ready to die? Possibly, but I just dont see it that way...I guess you'd have to know my beliefes about the afterlife in order to see what I mean and im not going into all that right now.

19) I kick myself in the ass every single day of my life for letting my sister abuse her kids in my presence and not knowing what to do about it. Im thankful that she has lost custody of them, and I wish my cousin (who has custody of them) would not let my sister see her children anymore...I think it would be for the best.

20) The current issue with the economy, our debt issue, or any other problems we're having right now...just..do not phase me, even though I know they should.

21) One of the only motivational forces I have in my life at the moment, is knowing that if I do not become succesful at whatever it is I do in my life, my mom will have no one to care for her when she is no longer able to do it herself. After years of working in health care and in nursing homes...I refuse to fail. For her sake at least, I will go to college, and I will make the money to support her.

22) When I dated Adam we were in a band together. I know I can sing, singing and writing have been my one true love since I can remember...for some reason though, I was always to shy to sing in front of him and when I finally did...we got offers to play in various venues around Virginia. We broke up three months later and the music died.

23) People say they have many role models in their life, or maybe they just have one...I havent found a person I admire enough to put them on a pedistal in my mind...when I do, I will probably spend the rest of my life with said person.

24) Everytime I see someone going on about the environment...it makes me want to go litter and plaster 'pave the planet' stickers on random cars.

25) Through the process of self discovery, I have discovered that I am a rather depressed person as of late but im  not to sure what to do about it. I've started meditating, and getting back into things I know I love..singing, writing, making jewelry, and getting more spiritual..I took the idea from a self help book I was reading. They claim if you reconnect with things you know you love to do, or get more spiritual, that you should start to feel better...Im here to tell you, its all a lie.
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Jan. 12th, 2009 @ 02:22 am mini update
 Due to pretty much no job openings in this area, and our lack of funds...we've decided to sell the house. We like it, its great...but its to big for us. We were kind of sad at first, now we're both excited to move on. Our roommate...is the biggest slob EVER. Serious. Words cannot describe the amount of filth this person not only lives in (i dread cleaning the upstairs room when he moves out) but makes around our house. Hes been here for four months or so and has yet to clean his bathroom...and its starting to look hella nasty. Not only that...take tonight for example. he made speghetti. Well, he got the sauce everywhere...and im not exagerating at all when I say he got it everywhere...on the bar, the sink, the stove, the floor..I can't help but wonder if he got any sauce on the actual noodles...best thing about it though...he never once bothered to clean it up. He'll make cerial in the morning or at night...and get it all over the floor...we still have some sitting under the lip of the dishwasher from a week ago...kind of gross but im conducting a small experiment..I want to see how long it'll stay there and if he'll bother to clean it up (doubtful). He also rolls his own cigarets, and gets the tabaco all over the staircase coming downstairs. He sloshes juice all over the bottom of the fridge so its nice and sticky..I could go on..and on..and on..hes just nasty. I was like 'DUDE! You have no respect for our house what so ever...you horde your dishes upstairs and let the food rot and mold all over them, and when you do bother to bring them down your perplexed when I ask you to fucking clean them'. We kind of got into a fight over his nastyness but he just cannot grasp that normal people do not live like that. Not to mention he has no car, so not only do we clean up after him, we play taxi as well because im to nice to watch someone walk in the freezing weather...but tonight, I think he was a little shocked by me asking him for gas money. I dont mind taking him up the street...but a half hour away? I think not. He said he had no money and I told him I had no gas then. He got pissed and went back upstairs. I just..dont care anymore. We never signed a renters form thingy and I could just..kick him out. But his 300 a month helps with grocerys and the phone/internet bill. I dunno, I hate being in my own house...OH! and the best part is...while we're sleep, (pat is the only person who works the roommate is a full time student and I simply cannot find a job close to our house) and he KNOWS pat gets up at 6 every morning..he stomps. And im not just saying every other footfall is a stomp..no no no..it sounds like we have a pack of wild elephants running around upstairs...plus, along with the stomping comes his abnormally loud stereo system that he basses all night long so Pat usually gets no sleep and hes way to nice about it...but thats all over. I pretty much told him if I have to listen to it for another night, while he was gone I was going to knife the wires...and im not kidding. The lack of respect for not only us, but our house...is just more then I can take at this point. I can't even cook without him coming downstairs and just..helping himself, although that was stopped almost immediatly. I dunno, but after this i've had it with roommates. My last roommates we never this bad...they had their annoying moments, but never like this. oi.  So yeah, there is my update, excuse the horrid spelling as im to tired to go back over it all. 
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Oct. 28th, 2008 @ 11:24 am O.o
Current Mood: blankblank
Current Music: Nightwish-Last of the wilds
Not a lot to really 'update' about I guess...struggling with Math for my GED, i scored 750 on all tests but one, which I got a 800 on..you cannot do any better really, but when it comes to math, i can't even score the 425 thats needed to pass the test. gah. Its the fractions. I can add them, I can subtract them...I cannot divide or multiply them, or do anything fancy with them...for some reason, I'll get how to do all this and more, but when I look at the paper two days later, im completely lost and cannot figure out how the hell I got them all right two days before. Oi. Its alright though, because I know without a doubt I can do it, at this point its really just a matter of doing it.
Pat and I are doing ok I guess, no fighting, and atm we're mostly worried about money issues but since we're getting a roommate at the end of November things are looking up. I can't believe we've been together for almost two years, and its even harder to believe i've lived in wisconsin for almost two years as well, god time is flying. O.o some good news...in Wisconsin you do not have to have your GED to go into the CNA program, so, while im doing my ged stuff im also taking my cna as of Jan (only class open, bah, nov-jan are full, except for the jan 26th one) but I have a feeling i'll be way done with my ged before jan, or at least I hope so.
October has always been my month, I love it, all the colors of fall and the cold weather...it use to feel magical, well almost anyway but this year has felt dull and lonely. As if something were missing. But then, I guess i've felt that way since I moved really, always feels like something is missing. ha, it snowed yesterday...I was driving home from school and I was like 'omg its snowing!!!!!1!' haha. amazing. But thats all i got for an update.
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Oct. 11th, 2008 @ 02:09 am Update
Current Mood: amusedamused
I figured i'd toss an update out there. School is going well, im struggling thru math, and stressed that I wont be able to pass this class. bah. I'll get thru the math, I have to, failing is not an option here! Not a lot really going on, i've picked up the guitar again and been fiddling around with that, still have to restring my accoustic but the electric works just fine. When im not at school of playing around with the guitar, im playing WoW, WotLk is coming out next month, and I already preordered my copy! yay! Now all I need is a job and i'll be set. Anyway, not a lot to really 'update' with, but there you have it!
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